One tool in the family security toolbox to explore is the use of code words and phrases. I know it sounds kind of silly, like you’re trying to act like James Bond or something. Turning everyone into secret squirrels isn’t the goal with this exercise.
Why Should You Have a Code Word?
There are two primary reasons why people use code words. They can speed up communication. Rather than going into detail about this, that, or the other thing, when the code word is used, everyone understands the meaning and acts accordingly. There are details that will need to be discussed later, but the core message is received loud and clear.
The other reason people use them is that the code word or phrase has a hidden meaning. It’s a way to communicate a message without others understanding what’s really being said.
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Here are a few different scenarios where having a code word established could prove useful.
Scenario 1 – Saving Face
Your adolescent son is attending a party across town. Around 9:30 PM, they’re getting uncomfortable with some of the shenanigans that are starting to unfold.

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You receive a text from them with a dog barking emoji. This is the signal that they need a reason to exit the party. You text them back something along the lines of, “Hey! You were supposed to clean your room and take out the trash before you left today. Get your butt home immediately! You’re grounded!” Now they can leave without losing any street cred, so to speak.
Scenario 2 – Security Risk
You and your spouse are shopping. Since this is an activity neither of you particularly enjoys, you split up to get it done quicker. You’re in the Produce Department checking prices on kiwis when you spot someone walking in the front door carrying a rifle. They head to the Customer Service desk, and they don’t look like they’re going to ask for a copy of this week’s sales ad. You call your spouse’s cell. When they answer, you say, “Dairy aisle, code red.”

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This is the area of the store furthest from the front entrance. Also, there’s a stockroom right behind it, through which you should be able to find a back exit. “Code red” is the code you’ve set up for immediate action, no questions asked.
Scenario 3 – Homeward Bound
The weather all day has been kind of all over the place. Sunny and warm gave way to overcast with falling temps. The wind picked up as the storm front barreled into the area much earlier than expected, and it looks like it might get worse before it gets better.

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Your spouse is with your eldest son, shopping for school clothes, while your younger son is with friends exploring the nearby woods. You send a message to the family group chat that says, “Home on the range.” This is the agreed-upon phrase that means everyone is to drop everything and get home immediately. Do not pass Go, do not collect $200.
Code Word Recommendations
There are a few guidelines to bear in mind as you pursue setting up code words or phrases.
1) Short – no more than three or four words. The whole point here is to send a message quickly.
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2) Unique – don’t use words or phrases that you’re likely to use in casual conversation. That helps prevent misunderstandings.
3) Less is more – avoid overdoing it. There’s little need to set up a dozen different phrases. Just a few will suffice.